The Midas Touch…

There was a time in my life where I had a sort of “Midas Touch” enchantment.

Everything I decided to do, everything I decided to pursue was successful and brought golden benefits in return.

I knew I was admired, and envied, by many different people, and that made me feel somehow powerful and proud.

Time passed and my Midas Touch stopped working. No matter how good I thought my ideas were, no matter how much I tried to put them in practice, they seemed not to work, neither to bring the benefits I was used to receive in return in similar occasions in the past.

I got lost! I was desperate! And instead of taking the time to understand the “whys” and maybe design different strategies, I just keep going and forcing my way in the same direction. The result, emotional and psychological injuries that led to a deep fall… and I can tell you that the hole was quite deep…

I started reading everything that would fall in my hands that I believed could help me to get over that moment and find new ways to stand back on my feet again. However... I was too proud to reach anyone for help. A mistake.

In one of those moments down the hole, I remember reading an article about a diver who almost drowned. She told the interviewer that she was in the deep ocean when she realised she couldn’t get up to the surface. She started fighting over it and the more she fought, the more she drowned... She fought up to the extent of exhaustion, then she had to let it go... That was it, the end. 

However, for her surprise, the spot where she was located was not as deep as she thought and she managed to hit the ground and with that she could leverage her little remaining strength and push herself up to the surface.

And she concluded the article saying something like “sometimes in life you have to let it go, hit the ground, to find the strength to get up to the surface again…”

That was it! That was the message I needed to hear. From that moment on, instead of fighting against the situation I was in, I let myself go into it and tried to understand what was around me, and tried to assess what were my possibilities and strengths and, most importantly, what weaknesses I could leverage into power. I then allowed myself to feel all the emotions around me without judgment. More as an observant. Not an easy task I must say. 

Some of those emotions were really painful, physically painful even. The feeling of failure, the feeling of loss, can be physically painful, trust me. However, facing them was the only way I could then understand why and how I let myself fall in such a deep hole. But also had to concentrate on the strengths I had and that could help me to find my way up to the surface again.

It was a painful process. I wouldn't say it was the best that could’ve have happened to me, for my personal growth, as many people do when they hit the ground. (I wished I didn't have to go through such a painful experience.) However, I would say, YES it was necessary for my growth! Some people don't go through such process because they have a different path, or made better decisions throughout their journey.

But, in my case, it was needed to make me realise that, as King Midas, I was able to transform many things into gold but that was not what it was necessary for my happiness and richness in file. 

Most of the things I was building were standing in sand. They didn't have a solid foundation, they didn't have a ground, and in many cases they even lacked essence, they lacked the real me on them. Therefore they were not sustainable. 

It is always great to be an achiever! It gives you confidence and a sense of power. But power without a strong set of values and principles, will eventually fall apart. Power comes from within, not from outside.

Although I always considered myself very spiritual, it was only then that I realised that I was disconnected from my own self. Since when? If I recall life events, I would probably be able to find the "when", but that was not what the main point was. The important thing was to get back in touch and build again the connection with my inner self, my inner power. 

This process has been going on for almost 6 years now. Quite a long process you might say. Not really. In fact, it is a life time process! And I’m allowing myself to live every moment of it. It is just now that I can feel that my Midas Touch is starting coming back, however, in a very different way. I know that the treasures I will create from now on will shine beyond matter. And that is what I’m up too, and that is what I believe is my mission.

A person who I recently met, who I can already address as a friend, told me the other day “Tulia, it is always one step after the other but... let it shine!”


How wonderful!

T

I want this, or better than this!

One of the "mantras" in the Silva Method meditation is "I want this or better than this!"

The principle behind it is that the Universe is abundant; there is more that enough available for everyone! The only thing we need to do is...ASK!

We are the only ones creating barriers in our own path; the ones who don't believe we can achieve that much, go that far, dream that high....

Today I came across this video from an airline company, WestJet, where the company decided to organise a Xmas surprise to their passengers.

What happened was unbelievable! I wish I was there! :-)

However, it reminded me the Silva Method mantra, and I asked myself, "would I have known what to ask for if I had been in that situation?" 

It really made me to be aware that from now on I'll make sure I'm present when opportunities knock my door, and won't forget to add to my requests "I want this, or better than this!"

Merry Xmas to you.

T

Now is my time!

Today I came across these teachings from Deepak Chopra, and I would like to share them with you. Namasté! :-)

“Wherever you go, go with all your heart.” Confucius

It is not uncommon to set a goal and then push forward with our eyes so fixed on the destination that we become unaware of the terrain on which we travel. Today we will practice navigating the path toward our destination with fluidity and balance, remaining attentive to our goal with present moment awareness. As we do so, we take a powerful step toward realizing our dreams and living our destinies.

In our passionate pursuit of our life’s purpose, our destination, we have the choice to stay present in the now, which increases our awareness of the many supportive cues and opportunities that arise along the path. Staying connected to the present enables us to enjoy every moment of the journey—the people we meet and the experiences we can enjoy with them—enriching us as we live out our deepest, most heartfelt desires.

Mindful Moment

Sometime today, when you catch yourself projecting into the future, take the time to practice 10 rounds of conscious breathing. Close your eyes and begin to witness the breath as it flows in and out of the nostrils. If it is helpful, count as you practice this, inhaling for a count of five, holding the breath, and exhaling for five. After you repeat this exercise 10 times, notice if you feel more grounded in the present, better able to seize opportunities as they present themselves in the here and now.

Deepak Chopra

What lies beyond...

"Once you conquer your fear of death you'll then be able live fully."

I don't know about you, but I always thought we are here in this planet for a reason, and that we have a "mission". I don't think we just happen to be here somehow and that one day we die and all is over. If that is so, to me it sounds a bit of waste of time and energy.

If I'm going to live just to die one day and that is it, why bother then? Why bother to learn, to improve, to grow, to become a better person, to give, to share...
If all we have is live and die, our existence in this planet would be more like been on holidays, no commitment, no giving, no engagement, just take, take, take.

Since early age it never made real sense to me that we die and that is it. If we look at nature for instance, in nature everything is somehow reborn. Living creatures die to give life to others, things change and transcend their matter to serve in another level of their existence; and why not we?

This is a subject that always fascinated me. The "mystery" around it, the many open questions on "what happen to us when we die?" The golden question! Life after death; reincarnation; discontinuity, continuity and all the derivations and deviations, are attractive subjects to me, even when sometimes they can also make me feel uncomfortable due to my lack of knowledge and higher understanding.

Unfortunately, in our Western culture death is seen like a "curse". Many people don't even want to mention its name to "avoid" it, at all cost! Trying to avoid the inevitable sounds a bit "delusional", doesn't it?

However, once we believe we are here for a purpose and that we have a mission - which I truly and fully believe - we can't keep pretending to be on holidays all the time, leading a passive existence, can we? We have to take responsibility over our actions, and to me, that is our first step towards getting in good terms with death.

Once we do that, we start living fully, and when we live fully we enjoy the moment and have no regrets because we stop the blaming patterns and internalize that life is about experience, is about being active, is about taking decisions, it is about taking the leadership of our own destiny in our own hands through our daily actions.

With that, when comes the day when Death knocks our door, we will open it to her with ease and in peace. Having the peace of mind and spirit of knowing that we lived this life with integrity to our values and beliefs and did our job the best we could, and instead of trying to run away from her, we will then extend our hand and let her take us and guide us to whatever place is the continuity of our own journey...

In memory of all beloved ones who are now in a different dimension.

I leave you here with Deepak Chopra and his insights.

Live and love fully.

T

Holidays

Sorry for my absence. I had the family over the past July, for holidays, and since then, I’ve been recovering…

Having the family over always brings “mixed feelings”. You are happy and excited to seeing them after a long period of time but deep down you know there will be “situations”.

I saw my mother last year, but hadn’t seen my sister and her family for over 3 years.

I used to believe my family was “quite standard”, but more and more, every time I’m with them, I am… let’s say… confused.

After living over 24 years abroad, you might agree with me that it is quite of a challenge to fit within your family “expectations”. Even worse considering that in fact they only expect you to be… the same.

After 24 years???!!!!

Anyway, I was going to be meeting my niece and my nephew again, and was excited about it. Being with kids is always “refreshing” and “revitalising” - considering the amount of energy they require from you, mentally and physically – and for their clear and straight-to-the-point remarks which make you questioning yourself; “where and when did I lose such spontaneity? Is that still recoverable?”

Family arrived, no majors, after the first updates, let’s plan for the holidays.

Surprise, surprise, they had made no plans. They came so see me! Great! I was really grateful and happy for that but, they would be on holidays for almost a month! Well... I had to plan their holidays for them. They didn't have the slightest idea of what could interest them doing or seeing.

Ok. Few ideas were put in place: Hiking tours, swimming on the lake, cycling tours, visiting little charming Swiss towns… and plans run smoothly for a while, I must say. Well, at least until when they decided to pay a visit to the “Blameland”!

You know Blameland, don’t you? Most families I know, and in fact, most people I know visit it quite often, and depending on the moment they are living they can stay there for a quite long period of time.

The problem with the Blameland is, once you’re there it is quite difficult to get out, let’s face it.

I’ve been there for long periods of time long time ago; mostly when I was a teenager. In fact, it seems to attract loads of them. However, there was a period of time in my adulthood that I used to hang around there in different intervals. Until one day I decided that Blameland was not for me anymore. It got too… let’s say… repetitive and unhealthy. I realised I didn’t connect to those visitors anymore. Ok, I can reveal that I had my Blamelandsick moments, but I knew it was not good for me to be there anymore. I had to “let it go”.

The problem with Blameland’s visitors is – and I can tell from my own experience – once you get hooked to it, you bring it with you everywhere you go! You can’t really feel at home outside of it, and for that, you try to recreate it everywhere you go. A real drag….

So, there was the situation, my family and Blameland in one pack. I was surprised to be confronted with it again - I mean Blameland - after not been there for quite a while; and I was also surprised to see how fast it was brought to life by my family.

I was very uncomfortable confronting with Blameland again to be honest, and tried by all means to give my family other alternatives of places to visit. It worked ok for a short while but, they had “this thing” with Blameland and it was not that easy to make them look around and appreciate other alternatives.

And because each person usually has its favourite place in Blameland – my family couldn’t be different - as you might guess, each one’s place is usually better than the other one. So… it is quite difficult to beat Blameland’s attractions. If you have been there, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

I tried it. In fact I tried hard to not get involved on those disputes because, at the end of the day, I haven’t visited Blameland that often anymore and want to keep it that way; therefore I’m not really interested on what it has to offer. To be honest, I avoid it, at all costs.

My last experiences there were not positive and at that time I made the decision that I should move on and look for other possibilities because I had this deep feeling that there were better places in this world and in life to be in; and I was dam right!

Believe me, there are plenty of them. Much better, healthier, richer and more pleasant than Blameland. But I suppose that not visiting Blameland for good is a very personal decision; and although it has a deceitful propaganda - once you stop visiting it you can see it clearly - its marketing seems to be quite good – follow the trend!

Well, as for my family, it was clear to me that no matter other alternatives I gave to them, they enjoyed them for a while but there was nothing comparable to Blameland.

As some people might say “there is no place like home”… as for my family that was home! Because, somehow, Blameland is still the place they feel comfortable to be in.

Well… tough!



T

All you need is...

…forgiveness. Then you can love, and be loved!

“Forgiveness engages The Universal Law of Allowance. It requires you to be conscious of the understanding that everyone, including yourself, has the right to be who and how she or he is, at any given moment. Forgiveness is the ability to allow and deal with errors and weaknesses inside yourself and others. It is a way to give up resentment and work through offenses resourcefully. It has the power to heal every part of your being: spirit, mind, body and emotions.” Laura Silva

Some people still believe that forgiving something means implying that what happened was ‘ok’. That is not what forgiveness is about. It doesn’t mean that you can undo what was done, or that you have to forget it. In fact, you don’t even need to like the person you are forgiving! You don’t need to reconcile, nor need you to reestablish a relationship with them, if this is not in your best interest.

There is nothing you can do to change the past physically. However, you can though, change it mentally, spiritually and emotionally. And in order to move forward in a healthy manner, it is vital to learn to let go of the past in order to have a more balanced, fulfilled and pleasant life.

Not forgiving keeps us hooked to, and manipulated by, ghosts from the past. It keeps us attached to negative emotions and feelings that prevent us to heal from those wounds and grow. Not forgiving is in fact, counterproductive. It makes you deaf, blind, and speechless.

Put yourself in the position of the ‘offender’, and consider that you also could’ve been there, in his/her position. The best way of trying to understand the actions of a person in any given situation is by ‘standing in her own shoes and see the world from its perspective’. You might realise that they did what they did based on the resources, the knowledge, tools and wisdom they had in that given moment. Saying that, you will realize in fact they did the best they could.

Separate the offense from the offender and in your heart and soul release the offender and let him or her go.

The act of forgiving is very empowering, and it is something that comes out of your own free will. The energy involved in forgiving is the same energy involved in being forgiven. It fills you with energy of goodness, of freedom of finally letting go of some old burdensome baggage.

We often want forgiveness, yet we refuse to forgive others, and ourselves. The greatest act of forgiveness is the act of forgiving oneself. You can only forgive others when you have already allowed yourself to be forgiven by yourself. 

It will only happen when you allow yourself the understanding that you, too, did the best you could, in that given moment, with the resources, tools and wisdom you had; no matter what anybody else says… 

And, bear in mind that "it is the forgiver that is freed when forgiving."

When that understanding happens, you will be able then to find the joy of living a life that is plenty, with all the love you need.

T
PS Inspired by the teachings of the Silva Method.

Today is a Gift...

And that is why it is called Present!

Since Eckhart Tolle released his book The Power of Now in 2004, a new world opened for many, including me. I was introduced to the book in Spanish about 2006, by a friend who was very enthusiastic about the subject; but it wasn’t until 2010 that when I told myself, “Hmm — let’s take a look at this one.” 

Why am I telling you all of these dates about a book? Well, it’s just to illustrate that, for each of us, transformation happens at different times. And, even if the tools are presented to you on several occasions — in my case by through my enthusiastic friend — transformation, the path to growth, only happens when you are open to it. And instead of saying “The teacher appears when the student is ready”, in this case I’d say, “The student can only recognise the teacher when ready.”

A new perspective on well-being was opened to me with the insights from Mr Tolle’s book. He manages to deconstruct a quite essential subject in a very down-to-earth manner. However, what a challenge he places on our table! Basically, he claims that the only way to achieve our well-being at all levels, mentally-emotionally-physically-spiritually, is by living and being in the “Now”! Past and future don’t exist! 

“Excuse me?” you may well ask. Well, they don’t exist, really. Think about it — the past is gone, and the future isn’t yet here. We can only live today, right now, in the Now! Living in the past only creates frustration; living in the future only creates anxiety! 

But you might say: “Well, but my past is my reference, my past is part of what I am! I can’t just ignore it and refuse to acknowledge it!” Yes, you're right but — the only way we will “build a past to be proud of; a memorable past” is by making sure we’re living a congruent life. When? Today, in the Now! 

Same for our future. You might say: “But if I don't need to care about the future, because it doesn't exist yet, what about my ‘future’? I mean, what about planning for a better life, professional goals, planning to have a family, children?” Yes, we all have to have goals, plan for our future, aim for a better life, and improve ourselves, but — we can only do all of that — when? Today, in the Now! 

You see, there’s no way around it. If we really want to improve our lives, live fully, tackle a problem or situation in order to move forward in our lives, in order to evolve and grow, we can only do it — today, in the Now! 

Tolle’s core message is that most of us spend our whole lives worrying, instead of living, simply because we don’t live in the present. We worry about what we haven't done, what we might have to do; or maybe should have to do or what we could've done; or, if I’d only known, I could’ve — whatever. Again, we’re neglecting the Now, today. 

We need to plan, of course, but we have to take action, today, in the Now! A problem is only a problem if no action is taken about it. When we do act, it then becomes a “project”.

The message is clear and simple: instead of sleeping on our problems, issues, situations, we ought to take action and transform them into projects. We can plan for our future, set our goals, and organize the tasks, and we can do today what corresponds to today. The tasks for tomorrow, do them in tomorrow’s today. And, if we are conscious of that, and put it into practice, when we look back, when we look to our yesterday, our past, even if there are things we believe should still be improved, we will have the certainty that we did the best we could with the resources and knowledge we had at the time, in the past’s today. And today we can improve them with the resources and knowledge we’ve accumulated, which will contribute to a better tomorrow.

Simple? Yes, the concept is. Easy to implement? Not at all! It requires the willingness to make that leap to change, when only you know when enough is enough! 

This whole concept was a true revelation to me. It really made a substantial shift in my way of seeing my life, the situations and people around me, and, most importantly, it released an enormous weight from my shoulders! Once I understood that the only way to have a balanced and fulfilling life is living today, I stopped worrying about tomorrow, because it doesn’t really exist! Only today matters! So, instead of creating factitious issues for tomorrow and turning them into problems, thus generating anxiety, suffering, frustration, depression, and so on and so forth — let’s live today, work on our projects today, enjoy our moments today, live life fully, today! Not yesterday, not tomorrow, Today! 

I personally know people who’ve spent and keep spending most of their lives and time waiting — waiting for the right time to do X, Y and Z; waiting for the right time to wear, or use, something that was given to them; waiting for the right time to — start living! 

The only day to prepare, for a memorable past and an amazing future, is today! It is a work in continuous progress; it requires a permanent state of awareness and constant vigilance. But speaking from my own experience, it’s worth it. Let’s not waste it!

"What day is it?" asked Pooh.

"It is today", squeaked Piglet.

"My favorite day"! said Pooh.

Have a great day!

T