…forgiveness. Then you can love, and be loved!
“Forgiveness engages The Universal Law of Allowance. It requires you to be conscious of the understanding that everyone, including yourself, has the right to be who and how she or he is, at any given moment. Forgiveness is the ability to allow and deal with errors and weaknesses inside yourself and others. It is a way to give up resentment and work through offenses resourcefully. It has the power to heal every part of your being: spirit, mind, body and emotions.” Laura Silva
Some people still believe that forgiving something means implying that what happened was ‘ok’. That is not what forgiveness is about. It doesn’t mean that you can undo what was done, or that you have to forget it. In fact, you don’t even need to like the person you are forgiving! You don’t need to reconcile, nor need you to reestablish a relationship with them, if this is not in your best interest.
There is nothing you can do to change the past physically. However, you can though, change it mentally, spiritually and emotionally. And in order to move forward in a healthy manner, it is vital to learn to let go of the past in order to have a more balanced, fulfilled and pleasant life.
Not forgiving keeps us hooked to, and manipulated by, ghosts from the past. It keeps us attached to negative emotions and feelings that prevent us to heal from those wounds and grow. Not forgiving is in fact, counterproductive. It makes you deaf, blind, and speechless.
Put yourself in the position of the ‘offender’, and consider that you also could’ve been there, in his/her position. The best way of trying to understand the actions of a person in any given situation is by ‘standing in her own shoes and see the world from its perspective’. You might realise that they did what they did based on the resources, the knowledge, tools and wisdom they had in that given moment. Saying that, you will realize in fact they did the best they could.
Separate the offense from the offender and in your heart and soul release the offender and let him or her go.
The act of forgiving is very empowering, and it is something that comes out of your own free will. The energy involved in forgiving is the same energy involved in being forgiven. It fills you with energy of goodness, of freedom of finally letting go of some old burdensome baggage.
We often want forgiveness, yet we refuse to forgive others, and ourselves. The greatest act of forgiveness is the act of forgiving oneself. You can only forgive others when you have already allowed yourself to be forgiven by yourself.
It will only happen when you allow yourself the understanding that you, too, did the best you could, in that given moment, with the resources, tools and wisdom you had; no matter what anybody else says…
And, bear in mind that "it is the forgiver that is freed when forgiving."
When that understanding happens, you will be able then to find the joy of living a life that is plenty, with all the love you need.
PS Inspired by the teachings of the Silva Method.